Dear Marketing Department
Dear Marketing Department at Reach Toothbrushes Inc.,
I like your toothbrushes. I’ve been using them to clean my teeth for many years. They have done a reasonably good job to date, and I have had no reason to complain, until now.
Buying a new toothbrush is somewhat of an experience for me, I’m not a frequent toothbrush-purchaser, merely one who likes to be discerning. I like the ones with the little fingers that massage your gums. But that’s irrelevant now, completely immaterial, after the unfolding of recent events.
Whilst down at the local supermarket, I decided it was time for a new toothbrush. The range wasn’t great and as I’m a student it was even more restricted by my limited funds. In this situation I was stuck with a Reach toothbrush. Within this limited range, there were only two colours: 
a horrid purple; and a lovely green. As I was pressed for time, I choose hurriedly, and chose the green.
Usually when designing a product, one tries to make it as appealing and aesthetically pleasing as possible. This sometimes means the use of unorthadox materials and colours, but in no way should the design of the item impede its function. I don’t feel that it should be necessary to explain that a vomit-green coloured toothbrush is far from appealing to the general public, an a perfect example of (bad) design over function.
To this day I still reflect on how ridiculous it is to make a toothbrush in the colour of particularly lurid vomit. Who came up with that? Was it marketing? Was it the design engineers? Whoever it was, I beg you, remove the product from circulation, and fire the people responsible. It’s an atrocity.
Yours,
Will Midgley (a traumatised customer)
March 15th, 2007 at 10:03 pm
think of the poor toothbrush, cleaning your mouth twice daily, and you think ur the one gaging
March 19th, 2007 at 11:22 pm
Will Will Will… the toothbrush is perfectly fine! You’re complaint is based solely on the colour and I find that incredibly discriminative! I for one love green! And I had that exact same toothbrush! I LOVED the colour!! It’s not vomit green at all! If my memory serves me right, vomit is rarely the colour green, so really, your argument is somewhat flawed! From a green loving Sylv.
March 20th, 2007 at 9:15 am
But it’s such a lurid green! It burns the eyes and makes the head spin! And that’s not what I want first thing in the morning after having had breakfast!
As for vomit being green…it’s a long story. One not really appropriate for this communication medium!
March 20th, 2007 at 12:44 pm
So why didn’t you just get the purple one? At least its not as jarring first thing in the morning.
March 20th, 2007 at 4:50 pm
True, but I don’t like purple. And I wasn’t really thinking about how I would react to the colour early in the morning, it isn’t usually the first thing to enter my head when buying a toothbrush! :-/
March 20th, 2007 at 6:41 pm
well silly what else are you thinking about when buying a toothbrush? the stock market?
March 21st, 2007 at 1:28 am
I just think you’re trying to make a BIG DEAL out of a not so big deal thing.
March 21st, 2007 at 2:04 pm
Yes, yes I probably am. But what would life be like if I didn’t whinge at every little thing?
March 22nd, 2007 at 12:02 am
Less controversial.
March 22nd, 2007 at 5:03 pm
incomplete… will you complete me