Vanilla Slice
Okay, so I call it custard square, but call it what you will, this stuff is delicious. I’ve recently been told that there is a competition in Melbourne to find the best vanilla slice in the land. Excellent!
The reason it comes to mind, is that I tried to eat a slice of this today without dropping any on myself. Big mistake. If you’re not eating it over a plate, or you’re eating in public then you’d better have paper towels on hand. For starters, the things are usually too damn big to fit in your mouth, so you have to find some outlandish way to try and eat it. The best way I could find was to split it in half horizontally, and eat the bottom half, then the top half (it has the icing so you have to leave it till last). Cool, so the first problem is solved.
But, then there’s the problem of the vanilla custard. Now this one’s a tricky thing, because as soon as you try and bite into the slice - even if you have followed the above step - then the custard tries to squish out of the other end. I have yet to find a really suitable solution to this problem, but the best I could do was to take small bites from around each edge in succession. Seemed to work okay once I got the hang of it.
But this leads me to think, how the heck do they judge this competition? By the number of times they have to split the slice in half before they can eat it, or perhaps the amount of vanilla custard the judges find on themselves after trying to eat each contestant? I’m intrigued!
December 5th, 2006 at 9:03 am
Try lifting it with tongs. The number of completely destroyed Vanilla Slices I saw during my Brumby’s career was quite amazing. So many different ways to mash them.
Not to mention the time a whole tray of the stuff (because they’re made in about a 1m by 1m GIANT square) fell off a pastry rack inside the fridge straight on to my co-worker’s head. Mmm gooey.
Any which way you look at it, they’re just not a co-operative food…
December 5th, 2006 at 10:19 am
Yeah, split the slice in half infinite amount of times… lol
December 5th, 2006 at 3:31 pm
GeM, do you really know someone who had a giant vanilla slice fall on their head, that’s hilarious!
I agree that they aren’t co-operative, and that would be fine, except that they are so delicious…Damn!
I like the idea Dave, but how am I meant to eat an infinite number of infinitely small slices? I’d be stuck there forever!
December 5th, 2006 at 4:45 pm
Yep. She cried. We were 15 at the time and she was sooo scared of telling the baker what’d happened. Thankfully he had a sense of humour and laughed at us down the phone for a full 5 minutes…
December 5th, 2006 at 4:47 pm
Hah! Classic! Well I suppose at least it wasn’t you that the slice fell on. Did you actually have good luck back then GeM? Or did other people just have worse luck?
December 5th, 2006 at 8:03 pm
Week following “Vanilla Slice Strikes Back” (as it came to be known ‘mongst us bread-kids) I accidentally flooded the entire bakery…
Does that answer the question?!
*sigh*, those Brumby’s memories…
December 5th, 2006 at 9:21 pm
well if it tastes so damn good why are you complaining that you have to eat infinite peices? the slice is prob made in dr. xia’s infinitly long oven
in GeM we trust
December 5th, 2006 at 11:46 pm
Since you are finished school for the ’summer’ may I suggest a series of photos illustrating different methods of eating the infamous Vanilla Slice? I think it would be very entertaining indeed…
Also, I posted a photo of my desk mate on my journal Will, so you can check her out any time you want.
December 6th, 2006 at 10:04 am
Sach, some of us have started working 9-5 after the end of exams! So I don’t really have time to experiment with vanilla slice, although it would make for an entertaining weekend….
Wow, you’re getting all fancy with embedded pictures, and hyperlinks on your blog Sach, are you secretly learning HTML?
GeM did you actually flood a bakery? That’s hilarious! Bad luck really does follow you around doesn’t it? Or was that just the beginning of the bad-luck run? Remind me never to employ you. Anywhere. Especially near sensitive electronic equipment!
December 6th, 2006 at 10:22 am
Well you know… 18 hour days in studio is just NOT enough for me. I needed to find a little something extra on the side. HTML it is! Its very easy on my blog. My next mission is Adobe Indesign and Premiere (so I can make pretty project boards with image links and size movies small enough to upload!). Wow, I’m such a loser…
As for your 9-5… I’m sure its INCREDIBLY hard work, seeing as how you posted your previous comment at 10:04 am, my dear
And what about all those hours from 5-12 or whenever you go to bed… plenty of time for vanilla slice disections, don’t you think?
December 6th, 2006 at 5:30 pm
i agree… vanillia ice… er… slice off!
December 7th, 2006 at 8:37 am
Yes I wasn’t kidding. I flooded a bakery. Now you mention it, I think we’ve pinpointed when exceptional drama first occurred in my life.
For anyone who hasn’t heard me recount this (I think it’s sufficiently amusing to post):
I was 15 and the oldest employee in-store that day. Was scrubbing baking racks, and sink took ages to fill so I answered a phone call whilst I was waiting for it to do it’s thang. Phone call was irate customer whose bread delivery hadn’t arrived. Calmed her down, then was distracted by a massive crowd that all decided they needed bread AT THAT VERY INSTANT at the front of the shop. Raced out, and it wasn’t till my co-worker noticed we were standing in puddles I realised I’d left the tap running out the back…
No no, the drama has switched across to my personal life now. I’m completely safe to employ.
December 8th, 2006 at 10:39 am
Dear all,
Good luck with results!!
Sincerley
Jamesd
December 8th, 2006 at 3:43 pm
Cheers macguyver, don’t we all just love this time of year? :-/
Oh, and by the way, congratulations to sach for being the 600th comment on my site…man you guys talk some trash!
December 11th, 2006 at 9:34 pm
what else are friends for?
December 12th, 2006 at 5:14 pm
for eating vanilla slice with?